Here's one reason to not just rely on the scale - the measurements you clock in at various weight can be encouraging, even when the random number generator makes you feel like a hamster on a wheel! I have been frustrated with the teeth-yanking difficulty of the last ten pounds I have lost, mostly due to the head issues fell into on five pounds above and below 200. I retook my measurements and found the frustration of the last six months pretty much melt away in light of the real physiological changes. At the end of the day, losing the inches slowly doesn't matter to my brain as much as the fact that they are GONE, and I have to remember that.

Also, you can definitely tell I gain my weight like an apple, filling out and padding my torso instead of my limbs. From the beginning of this journey, 60+ pounds ago, I have only lost two inches off my arms, as opposed to almost ten off my waist :)

Measurements taken 11/8/11:

WEIGHT: 215.6 (official post-baby start weight)

WAIST: 41 in

HIPS: 50 in

UNDERBUST: 38 in

BUST: 49.5 in

ARMS: 15.5 in

THIGHS: 24.5 in

Measurements taken 5/10/11, with my original size from 10/3/08 in parenthesis

WEIGHT: 196.6 (257-260, minimum)

WAIST: 37 in (46 in)

HIPS: 47 in (55 in)

UNDERBUST: 36 in (46 in)

BUST: 47 in (56 in)

ARMS: 14.5 in (16.5 in)

THIGHS: 24 in (26 in)

So. Not only is the change from six months ago huge, in terms of inches, given how comparatively few pounds I have lost, but the rate of change since beginning this journey is immense. From my 'I've had it, this HAS to change, NOW!' moment while trying on clothes in October of the year my second daughter was born, to seven months out from the birth of my son, I have lost a grand total of 62 pounds and 40 inches.

40 INCHES! That's more than my oldest daughter is, tall! Thats HUGE on the days I feel massive and can't see any change, realizing the entire topography of my body has changed and I am a much smaller, healthier, and yes, happier person for it, makes all the difference in my outlook. I was frustrated and lackadaisical for months, but this was the last straw to jolt me completely out of it. I AM successful, and will actively and happily continue to be. I WILL get this weight off. I have a wedding to impress family at, a summer to enjoy, a husband to be sexy with, and the rest of my life NOT being obese to look forward to. There is absolutely no reason for me to feel discouraged. In the end, who CARES if it took me almost three years to get here? If I had never started, if it really didn't matter, I'd likely be heavier than my starting weight, as opposed to three clothing sizes smaller, and lethargic, depressed, and a poor role model for my children.

I look different, but more than that I AM different. God has been doing an amazing work in my heart and I am more joyful and peaceful as a result. He has also facilitated this great work on my body, which is slowly and gratifyingly changing it into a functional, healthy shell to help me get through my day. The day to day struggles are still frustrating, but a little perspective on this makes a world of difference. After ten years of being obese and three years of losing, I have a whole life to look forward to at this smaller (and hopefully smaller still!) size. With only small daily habits of food logging and weighing, and daily mindfulness about my eating, I can maintain and improve my body. It is so hard to quantify the vast differences in confidence, self esteem, and quality of life this change in my eating and exercise has afforded me. 40 inches may well have been 40 link of chains, for all the things they kept me from doing. 60 pounds was suffocating the life right out of me, because I told myself the lie that food made me happy and I didn't need restraint.

On days when I still struggle with food being an idol, I need to remember how I feel standing on top of this hill and looking back at where I just hiked. It's a darn good feeling and I don't want to let it go.