It's been a rough week, very busy and not with the best food. I was the snack coordinator for my church's Vacation Bible School this year (as I have been for three years running) and it is a lot of hours both at the church during the day and back again for evening prep. I have been on my feet running around for literally six or more hours each day, taking sandwiches when I can and trying not to contract too much.

My weight, coincidentally, has skyrocketed this week something ridiculous. Some of it is genuine gain, I am absolutely HUGE right now, but given the swelling in my face and legs I can only assume a good amount of it is water retention from sore muscles, salt, stress, what have you. The VBS is certainly fun, but I have arguably the most physically demanding job in it, and this pregnancy is not treating me well at this point. I am thrilled it is over and have the next few days to try and get back on track with sleep, food, chores, and everything else that took a major back seat the past six days.

I'm exhausted. The blogging has taken quite a back seat when I can't barely find time to check my email!

Let's just get the weight thing out of the way (weigh?): I was at 221.8 this morning, after being at 219.6 Saturday. The reason for the jump? I was in the hospital yesterday, being pumped full of fluids!

Oh yes indeed, after being almost sure that staying at church yesterday morning would equal a Taryl on the floor, I had my husband take me home in the middle of service. I was dizzy, breaking out in cold sweats, couldn't catch my breath even though I was sitting and barely moving, and yet my heart rate was very low. This has happened before when I try to sing hymns, the combo of standing AND singing generally commands more air than I can get at this point in the pregnancy, but this is the first time it wouldn't go away. So at home I gave the OB triage nurse a call and she told me to come in.

Cue monitoring!

I got in around 11:30, if I recall, and couldn't leave until 4:00. My poor kids were good the whole time despite being late for their nap. Basically they took a strip on the baby, who was moving a shocking amount, and on me, who was moving less but in essentially perfect metabolic health. Heart rate was 60-63 BPM on average, blood pressure was 114/75, no signs of a UTI, ketones, etc etc. The ONLY thing that was off was my blood sugar, which was at something like 72, on the fairly low side of normal. I had eaten breakfast that morning, so the nurses advised me that the awful symptoms I was feeling could very well be a hypoglycemic response, and thus i had to be fairly strict about eating every two hours. I was also so dehydrated (despite drinking water) that it took three tries to get the IV into me for fluids and two tries for a blood draw. I felt like a pincushion, and the entire thing was extremely unpleasant. But after two bags of IV fluids I was indeed feeling much better. So the lesson for the day, apparently, is that church does a number on my eating schedule AND I drink less water there than at home!

My health is good, the baby is fine, and the scale is showing some water retention and poor eating choices from the evening (after a healthy dinner I ended up mindlessly munching on a bunch of junk, somewhat out of stress/exhaustion). I was mad at myself for eating without being very hungry and not controlling my intake better, but today is another day and I am committed to eating as on plan as ever. The stress and pain of yesterday is behind me, today is a GOOD day, and the scale? It'll take care of itself.

As for me, I have some water and protein to snarf, so I'm on my way :)

I am glad it was nothing more serious, but I hope this doesn't mean my blood sugar isn't regulating well. I still havent heard back on my glucose tests so I will assume no news is good news, but I need to give them a call and schedule an appointment to update them on what happened yesterday.

Well, it was entirely uneventful. I am still up just under ten pounds for the whole pregnancy, though still measuring hugely ahead at 33 weeks (relative) fundal height. It didn't jump significantly from last appointment's size, so they aren't concerned, but I definitely wonder if he is going to be a bigger baby than his sisters or just pees a lot of amniotic fluid :)

My blood pressure was stellar at 120/70, and my glucose test was uneventful (no dizziness or nausea). I should get the results of my sugars in the next few days, with any luck, but I am not too worriedly. If I could pass at 50 pounds heavier and a lot junkier eating, I'd be intensely surprised to NOT pass when I am in such better health. Age does increase insulin resistance during pregnancy, but with baby #3 I am STILL younger than many women are with baby #1, these days! Thus I don't think age will be a factor until I am well over 30.

Let's see, they didn't have anything epic to say about the intense pelvic pain and pressure other than that it sounded like really bad round ligament pain, coupled with the pelvic symphisis dysfunction I already knew I had (get it every single pregnancy). Her only recommendation was pelvic support from a girdle, so I'll be looking into that. A sweet friend offered hers to me and I'll give that a shot first, and if that doesn't fit I may have to bite the bullet and go get fitted for one at the pharmacy. We'll see, but I am both relieved that its no major issue and bummed that there's no solution. Her advice was to not exercise if it was hurting, she wasn't concerned about my weight gain or health enough to recommend that exercise was more important than rest.

If I feel good and want to move I will, otherwise I have official permission to loaf around on the couch :)

Nothing more to tell. I have another appointment on August 8th and then I go every two weeks for a month, before my appointments move to once weekly. Not too much longer to go now!

Well this will all be very boring, but that's okay! My weight this morning was 219.6, which I am happy about, after some food *cough*pizza*cough* kept it higher with sodium for three days. I was in a parade at our local fair this past Saturday and was thankfully driving the vehicle instead of marching out in front, because there was no WAY I could have walked at that speed and distance without pain (fast walk for over a mile, with hills, darting back and forth to either side of the road to hand out candy and fliers). As it was, my husband and I walked through the fair to look for some lunch afterward and I almost couldn't make it. I had to stop every few steps to try and get the tightness and pain to subside. It wasn't full on contractions, but the ligaments in my pelvis as well as my poor, useless abs protested the whole time. We walked VERY slowly but it was quite a painful and intense chore.

In light of that and my last exercise attempt, I do think that I may try to do a few videos but I am not going to keep persisting through pain. If I have a day where I feel great and the exercise isn't hurting I'll do it, but right now I just have NO abdominal support or strength, and my hips are a mess. I am really sad too, that our budget right now has disallowed continued chiropractic visits, because my pelvis is definitely slipping out of alignment and causing more pain.

My eating has been fine, my target calories, without exercise, are at around 1980 right now, and that is for a pound-a-week loss. I generally overeat those by about 250-500 calories, depending on my hunger and food choices, and I figure that's fine as well. I am essentially maintaining on the food front and the scale will do whatever it wants. Some days I eat more, some days I eat less, I am generally feeling strong and satisfied at the end of the day and so I will continue on in this eating pattern until postpartum makes me re-evaluate my plan, based on my hunger and weight loss goals.

I have an OB appointment tomorrow with the midwife of the practice and I will be bringing up my pain during exercise and general discomfort. I have had a huge, tight, swelling feeling lately, and I think our son had a massive growth spurt to have pushed my uterus so high, so fast, but I want to double check it isn't something amiss. Either way there has been a TON of pressure and general discomfort that comes with being huge and getting bigger, and that is definitely limiting what I feel I can do. For now I am focusing on keeping up with my daily schedule, more or less, and trying to fight my nightowl tendencies to get enough rest. Unless the midwife encourages me otherwise, I will probably shelve exercise again, unless it is necessary or feels okay to do. The ligament pain is just intense and not something probably worth enduring at this point.

Every pregnancy I say I will look into belly support and every pregnancy I don't do it, despite needing it. Maybe it's finally REALLY necessary now! I see what I can find in the way of pregnancy girdles/belts that may help my back a bit. I really appreciate all input and comments on the subject of exercise, and I think my conclusion, especially after this weekend, is that the benefits of exercise right now probably don't outweigh the disadvantages of the strain it is putting on me. So I will try to maintain my daily activities, sans intentional exercise, and hope that keeps me in decent enough shape to be flexible and resilient for birth.

I'll report in after my OB appointment is anything is interesting :)

I'm actually stumped here, dearest Internet.

I really can't figure out if I should be exercising or not.

The walking is not exacerbating my pelvic symphisis issues at all, those actually seem to improve/abate for a bit after working out, but my belly is really painful for the walking and that has NOT been abating through the course of the exercise, it actually gets worse. Imagine two Charlie horses in the front of your hips that draw tighter and tighter the more you move. Sharp, burning pain. That is round ligament pain, during pregnancy, except usually it is just a twinge from a funky movement and goes away. Unfortunately it seems through the course of my twenty minutes working out that it just persists.

It is excruciating, but I really enjoy the exercise overall, I just can't seem to get a handle on those ligaments. With how short I am my belly gets huge and pendulous fast, and that puts a strain on those ligaments as they bear much more weight. Walking is a shock to those shock absorbers, and every step hurts when they decide to act up.

Now, as to where I am torn (figuratively, not literally thank goodness!), round ligament pain is USUALLY harmless, if really, really, uncomfortable. It isn't a sign something is 'wrong' and while pregnancy is the time to take it easy and not overdo it, I can't figure out if the muscular, cardiovascular, and energy benefits of moving outweigh the disadvantages of this pain. I don't know if it is something I should head or push through, because it is a common pain and not indicative of a problem with my body like a contraction would be.

I've had a few contractions working out as well, and you CANNOT mark or walk through those! I definitely have to pause and wait for them to pass before moving again. It's nothing regular or too strong so those don't worry me, but nonetheless I am really struggling with finding a light activity to do that won't cause me pain.

I need to verify but I am pretty sure I have an OB appointment next Wednesday (for my 28 week check and glucose test) and I will bring it up then. In the meantime, I am honestly stumped - the more active one is during pregnancy the better labor usually goes, the faster the recovery, the better positioned the baby, etc etc. I honestly have no clue where the equation gets tipped and one does more harm than good by moving, especially when the pain signal is explainable and not related to preterm labor. I have honestly never been very active during a pregnancy, I am a couch slug, and walking has generally been very painful at the end of each pregnancy. But this time I WANT to move and I am not sure if I should. What do I do?

As promised, here is a shot of how I look today, at 219.8 and 27 weeks pregnant, so about six-ish months and nine pounds heavier than where I started. My bathroom lighting is absolutely awful in this shot, but oh well!

My underbust is smaller than prepregnancy by about an inch, and my belly is measuring several weeks ahead. And yes, I have carried every single pregnancy very high, which makes me look like I have swallowed a beach ball. On the upside, I am happy that I definitely look pregnant, as opposed to just fat! Our son should be weighing in at a little over two pounds and fifteen inches long. He is flipping around like crazy and has very obvious sleeping and waking cycles (usually the opposite of me, of course ;) ).

I have always thought looking and being pregnant agreed with me, I honestly love it, even with the aches and pains. Given the size of family we want, it's a good thing I like all of this!

If you would like proof that I am not actually bald, there's a hastily snapped progress shot WITH hair in my album. I just dropped it out of the updo, so it's not combed, but it does indeed exist!

Off to go workout now :)

Well, my weight is up slightly this week, to 219.8. I feel pretty good and haven't had any major contracting episodes. I will be trying to work in a mile of Walk Away the Pounds as well, after lunch time today, so wish me luck!

My eating has been pretty good. I'm still splurging a bit here and there (those evil M&Ms are ALMOST gone, thanks to feeding them liberally to my kids and in a more measured fashion to myself) but really not doing anything crazy. In fact I am really quite proud of myself for staying pretty much on plan when I have a million excuses not to!

I am officially in my third trimester now, as counted by my OB (27 weeks), so new belly pictures will be coming. I look pretty good, if I do say so, myself!

As always, I am hoping I am losing some weight through my slight calorie restriction during pregnancy, but if I end up at around 210 after a few weeks postpartum (to let the swelling and water retention settle) I'll be a happy girl as well. Maintaining is what I've been aiming for, and hopefully that is what I'll achieve.

Off to another healthy week!

Well I did manage to get off my lazy butt for the first time in over a month to do a structured workout and used one mile of a Leslie Sansone DVD. I definitely couldn't throw myself into it, I couldn't lift my leg high enough without pain and just felt way too unstable moving frenetically. So I dialed it back to maybe a 6-7 on the 10 point scale of effort and managed to do the warmup and mile with no serious issues.

Beginning it, I had a lot of pain and twinges on my right side, which I know was round ligament pain. It almost feels like a stitch in your side from running, but it is deeper, lower, and in the front of the hip, not above it. That hurt, but it did subside and only certain movements caused it. I also contended with pubic symphisis pain from overly relaxed ligaments holding my pelvic girdle together. Basically it feels like a hot poker being shoved into your hip or pubic zone from the bottom up. It is a shooting, burning pain I've had the joy of contending with every pregnancy, I doubt it will go away in the future as it has nothing to do with weight and everything to do with hormones and my own physiology.

That is ever present, whether I am laying down, walking, whatever. If I lift my leg it hurts, when I sit it hurts. It's life, and not a pain that will be better or worse if I baby it. So I pushed through that as well, and surprisingly, as my joints got warmer and my alignment got better (my muscles pulled my skeleton back together, I think ;) ) eve that pubic pain stopped a bit, which is AMAZING! So yeah, it wasn't as easy at it was prepregnancy, and I didn't exert myself as much as I used to, but I still got a lightly elevated heart rate, a good stretch, and warmer muscles and joints. Warming them up did indeed help the daily aches subside just a smudge (at least here in the immediate after), so I consider the whole prospect a win.

Given that it didn't make me contract at all or aggravate anything I can think of, I will make a more concerted effort to do a mile a day until my body says 'stop' again. Even with how pooped out and sore I am, this did seem to help me out, so I think any movement I can do will benefit me at this point,

My lazy side is pouting at this revelation, but the rest of me feels pretty darn good ;)

Well my weight has been all over the place these past two weeks but it seems to be settling after another jump again. My belly is also huge, so I'll forgive the scale any indiscretions against me ;)

From Friday to this Wednesday my weights were: 220.0, 219.8, 221.0, 221.2, 221.4, 219.4, and today's weight was 220.4. No particular reason for any of these, just fluctuations of food, sodium, baby pee, who knows. It can be maddening, but overall I think I can say finished this month up by about three pounds, and most of it will fall off in another few months.

Onto fun stuff! I will be doing another belly picture in two weeks, when I hit the third trimester, but I happen to have a preview of it since a dear friend of mine threw a birthday party for herself with a fabulous henna artist and I got some arm work done. She posed me very nicely for the shot and both the henna AND belly look pretty awesome, if I do say so myself :)

The glitter only lasted for a day as it was just a pretty filler, and the dark brown henna flaked off to reveal the orangey/brown stain that is still very dark, even four days later. It was a good batch of henna.

Here's a picture of me with my friend Deanna (left) and the birthday girl Elizabeth (middle), who also happens to be the owner of these photos:

Consequently, you think I'd realize after so many obnoxiously bald-looking pictures that having my hair in buns for pictures just isn't all that flattering on someone who is round like me. Another more weight related realization of these shots is that, though I have arguably gained ten pounds now (at 26.5 weeks pregnant) it really isn't in my face or anywhere else but my belly, that I can see. My face looks about the same as it did in my prepregnancy pictures, with no major bloat. And since I show ALL my weight and water retention in my chin(s) this gives me additional comfort that this weight will completely or mostly drop off post-birth. I just keep having to do MY part and watch that if I AM hungrier than my daily calories, I am eating healthier than not.

My hips are killing me, as they do by this point every pregnancy (it keeps getting a few weeks earlier, but I blame that on my body settling into pregnancy earlier each time), and so even rolling over in bed or lifting my leg to get up another stair is stabbing pelvic pain. Even if I was trying to exercise each day (which I haven't been), I honestly don't know if I could do it. At this point I can barely sit on a normal couch, it bugs my back and hips so much. So I have been confined mostly to a stability ball for a chair and standing. My plans for exercise have thus essentially been shelved. If I get an urge and feel good I may do it, but right now it's just too much to bother with.

My only concern with shelving the exercise is that I can already tell I am losing some muscle tone, and I NEED that muscle tone for an easier birth. So right now I need to seriously weigh the mental priority of going easy on myself vs. forcing myself to do SOME exercise and try to maintain tone in my legs, back, and abs. Birth is harder than a race in a lot of respects, and going into it without some training is asking for problems (as I have experienced in the past). So I can't quite decide if I should make a serious effort to overcome this pain and my laziness or keep taking it easy. I can persist in my normal household duties for the most part, needing more sleep now, but I am hesitant to exert myself any more.

I continue to mull over this and other things. In the meantime, I'm just plodding along in stasis, eating the same and watching the scale slowly move up (or rather, stay stay JUMP, stay stay JUMP). I am probably eating 2200-2400 calories most days, as I am not eating SUPER healthy (some higher fat foods and desserts) and have been hungrier. But for the most part 80% of my eating is quality and I am writing it all down. I will need to tighten back up for weight loss mode post-baby, but for now I am enjoying a higher calorie, more lax way of eating without any inexplicable gains :)

Happy Summer Solstice, everyone! It's a pretty special day here in Alaska, given how crazy our daylight situation is. It will stay bright enough outside tonight that you can read a book outside without any additional light on it. We've had rainy, overcast, cooler weather for almost the entire past month, but today is beautiful and sunny, not a cloud in the sky. This makes for a much brighter solstice, indeed!

As for my weight, I am down from the past two days to 218.8, which is still high, but oh well. I don't think I'll be able to make my mental goal of keeping my weight out of the 220's during this pregnancy, but it is still less than 9 pounds of gain, so I can't complain too much. I'm back on track with my eating today and doing very well, except for some general fatigue and not moving around much. I just haven't been feeling it, to tell the truth, and especially with my tiredness and contracting, at this point I am considering any movement a total bonus.

Melynda asked a question on a previous entry and it is a good one! For calorie counters, like me, how do we estimate our daily calorie needs? Well, basically you begin with some theoretical metabolic calculations from your age, weight, frame, and activity level. There are formulas to do this, and dozens of online calculators to help. Then, once you figure out your Basal Metabolic Rate (how much you burn just laying in bed all day) you adjust your caloric intake to have a net loss at the end of your day, which means you are burning calories and thus losing weight.

For me, I use the calculator on my iphone App called Loseit, which estimates my maintenance calories to be around 2300 a day, and thus I can cut that amount to see varying levels of weight loss. Currently I am eating at around 2000-2200 calories a day and gaining very slowly, but likely just baby weight. I should actually be losing fat. Pre-baby I could eat 1600-1800 calories a day and lose a pound or so per week.

Basically you are your own science experiment. The calculators are just a starting point, but basically you pick a calorie amount, measure and track your food calories and exercise expenditures, and see how you lose on that amount. That is where a weight log like the one I posted in the The Chart comes in handy. After a few weeks of weighing in daily it will tell you exactly how many calories you are in excess or shortage of from daily maintenance. So if you are in calorie deficit of 410 per day, you would be losing right around or slightly under a pound a week. You can then choose to raise or lower your calories depending on the results you want to see. Logging your caloric intake AND weight is really the best way to see how your body reacts to what you are eating.

My daily routine to track my weight is just to log my weight after using the bathroom in the morning, usually with no extra clothes on. I enter that into my weight log. Then throughout the day I measure my food (some things I weigh/measure strictly, like peanut butter, while other foods, like fruits and veggies, I just loosely measure) and log what I eat into my Loseit app and aim for around 2000 calories a day. Lately I have been eating over that amount if I am hungry for more, but this is more of a maintenance/intuitive eating time for me than if I was in active weightloss mode.

I hope that answers the question. You can actually modify your diet without any calculators at all, but you have to then be extra vigilant on tracking your food intake to get a precise number. Raise or lower it as needed until you see results you want, and give it a good month or two before changing to a different amount, to give your body plenty of time to react.

I had a rough, long, boring, stressful day today. It started early and has ended late, and I ate fairly badly for dessert tonight. I'll give my basic menu today, in the interest of full disclose.

Breakfast was some granola (homemade) and nonfat plain yogurt.

Lunch was carrots, an apple, a peach, and some leftover homemade pizza from last night. This was eaten at a six hour conference in place of the meal they served (which was overpriced and not that tasty, anyway).

Dinner was what my Inlaws served. I had a slice of block Parmesan for a snack. The main event was some hamburger and bratwurst with no buns, corn, some baked beans, grilled onion, and a small serving of rhubarb cobbler.

This wasn't bad, I was within or close to my daily calorie estimates, as far as I could tell. Deciphering the calories in my MIL's cooking is tricky, but she is a health nut and all the food was good quality and not laden with fat.

The problem came about when I got home from this day. I made my DH a cake for father's day and didn't use as much discretion as normal when cooking. I was still very full from dinner, but I WANTED cake batter and frosting. So I ate some, and maybe a 1/4 cup serving of peanut m&ms as well. But the cake was very rich - devils food cake with penuche fudge frosting - and I was physiologically full to begin with. I only had a small sliver of cake, an inch by two inches from my 9x13 pan, and a cup (literally) of milk. I was satisfied with that amount, I got a taste and was good.

But the previous junky foodfest hit my stomach and now I feel icky full, as often happens to me later in pregnancy (my uterus is mere inches from my sternum now, very squished stomach as a result). So while my eating was maybe 500 calories over my budget, maybe more, I feel MUCH worse than I would otherwise because of the lack of room. I feel like I ate a house instead of a few spoonfuls of frosting and a half cup of cake batter. It wasn't much of a binge, but it feels like it.

To learn from this, I do feel a little guilty, but I know beating myself up over one evening's worth of bad food, when the rest of the day was planned, is silly and pointless. I knew what I was doing when I did it, and it definitely was naughty and not very healthy. It also wasn't very satisfying. This does just reinforce why I usually eat moderately and enjoy some desserts but don't let myself go overboard. Some foods are tough for me, and brownie batter/chocolate cake batter/any cookie dough are at the top of the 'I have no control!' list. But I did only eat a sliver of the finished cake, with little desire for more over the next few days. It's simply too sweet and rich. And the batter is now out of my house, not to return any time soon. And my husband and kids will enjoy is treat without me feeling very tempted at all.

I can't shake my disappointment in my slip, especially since I usually do very well, and having the scale climbing up has made being vigilant a little more difficult than normal (its just the way pregnancy goes!). So I think my plan it to remember is feeling of icky over-fullness, the sweetness that is more sickly than tasty to me, and the fact that even a few counted and measured slices of homemade pizza sit in my belly just fine provided I have eaten a lot of fiber and not OVEReaten on the richer foods. A little goes a long way, and this just reminds me how much I need to listen to my fullness cues and not overeat. It just isn't a pleasant thing to do.

So I have fessed up to a bad evening. My game plan, as always, despite any guilt I may feel, is to get right back on the horse tomorrow morning with a healthy breakfast, a solid lunch, and a very light dinner (those seems to be the combo that helps me avoid heartburn the best in the evenings). The scale may go way up due to sugar and salt, as well as sleep deprivation lately. But what the scale does doesn't need to affect my health or responses to my situation. As o have said countless times, I control my eating, and the scale will go where it may. Overeating during pregnancy, especially, is NOT worth it, and if the scale does go up, I am committed to that reason NOT being my lack of healthy habits of vigilance over what goes in my mouth.

I am by no means a diet Nazi, but there is just next to no payoff to indulging in the things I did tonight. I know why I did it - stress, exhaustion, availability, and a handy excuse of a holiday for my sweets-loving husband. But none of those are good enough reasons to feed that empty junk to my body and overstuff myself to the point of discomfort. So onward I go from tonight, and tomorrow morning will be just as it usually is - healthy and on plan. We all slip and fall, but the real strength is in getting back up.

So it has been spoken of on here before, but I will reiterate it again: I am a daily weigher. I do this so I can chart exactly how my body responds to food and exercise, as well as things like pregnancy and vacations. And those things - both pregnancy and vacations - have laid themselves out in fine form on the last six months of my chart. Behold!

This is the data from my weights from the middle of December to today. The gray line is the actual data, the red line is the overall adjusted trend of what those numbers actually DID. The flat parts of the line indicate times I was away from the scale for vacations. January and February's flat lines were the trips to California for my Grandmothers' funerals, the long flat portion in April was the trip to Michigan to visit my husband's family and friends.

There is a clear pattern demonstrated by these events - I have a flat line (vacation), followed by high spiking weights (sodium, water retention from travel, stress), and then a gradual downward trend to a stable weight for a few weeks or months until the next vacation, or a slight upward trend when I started gaining some baby weight.

Why I am showing you these charts, or explaining my weight patterns to you?

Well, for starters, a lot of people in the weight loss blogosphere would see such a chart and point out the massive fluctuations, the gains, the returns to normal, the overall NOT loss pattern of it. They would be horrified if this were their personal chart, it looks that bad. The graph doesn't lie, I gained weight overall, even with the corrections after travel.

But that isn't what I see. For starters, this is a pregnancy, and a HEALTHY pregnancy. Yes, I have gained weight, but even with the initial shock of the jagged daily inputs and the condemning upward trail of the bright red line (kind of reminds you of a teacher's grading pen, doesn't it?), we must assess the data as a whole, and that is an exercise is self acceptance, understanding, and knowledge of one's body AND habits. It is a marvelous thing to behold, and EXPLAINABLE!

No gain is unexplained in the journal notes that go along with these weights. There were the trips, dates with my husband, salty soups, any number of workout routines tried, a few mornings of constipation, and any number of normal water weight fluctuations that go along with being a human being.

Then there's the overall trend, which looks pretty bad without the margins, but let's take it in context of the units measured. I went up approximately seven pounds from my low pre-pregnancy weight (210-211) to today (216-217). That was over the course of SIX months. I managed to eat reasonably enough that I have only gained .18 pounds per week. Less than a FIFTH of a pound per WEEK of gestation. The daily calorie excess isn't even accurate, as it cannot account for the fact that I am growing a human being, with all the assorted biological sundry along with it (placenta, amniotic fluid, our son's own rapidly gaining mass). I started this segment of my weight journey, post Christmas holiday season, with a good weight (just barely dipping below 210) and a small bunch of growing and dividing cells. Now I am here, six months heavier, with a two pound, 14 inch baby inside, a slimmer face, fuller bust, rounder hips, and a whole BUCKETFUL more knowledge about myself and my weight loss than I had when I began.

Along the red trend line, what you don't see, is that I have essentially maintained or even LOST excess weight while still keeping a healthy set of habits and a reasonably healthy lifestyle. I have faithfully logged my weight and food and kept up on my healthy habits without ANY real scale payback. God has blessed me with, not only my wonderful unborn son, but a trial period of weight maintenance and habit development that will bless me for the rest of my life. I have LEARNED how to be a maintainer, before the heartbreak and confusion of getting to a goal weight and then having to figure out what is next. Through this chart that is GAINING despite my healthiest habits and efforts, I have learned to make peace with my body and what *I* need to do to both manage my weight AND live my life in balance.

For me, daily weighing has been invaluable, both through pregnancy and before. It has taught me what my body does and why, how I respond to the stimuli and input (food) I experience, how I lose and what is a real issue (the red trend line going up when I am in losing mode) and what is just my body functioning as it should (PMS bloat, excess water weight that will subside, pregnancy gains, etc). I have been able to take random numbers generated from the scale and create data I can USE to understand how I function best, and what I need to do to see the scale go down, up, AND stay fairly even. I have had that entire scope of experience in the past six months, and I am better because of it.

This chart isn't failure, it is empowerment. It has taken power away from the scale and given it to ME, by helping me understand what the numbers mean and what to expect from my routine, instead of me sitting on the scale Monday morning and praying things turn out the way I want them to. With that trend line I can see if my eating genuinely has me headed for a gain and correct it BEFORE the pounds pile on, as much as I can see when I have a sodium spike that is nothing to freak out about. I also have learned how to keep the whole thing in perspective, and that the number on the scale doesn't reflect my worth as a person or EVEN my success as a dieter. Its' going up with the baby has made it necessary for me to divorce habits I KNOW are good from a scale that, without context, would indicate failure. I can be content and healthy without needing the validation of dropping weight. I will NOT yo yo diet and get frustrated by maintenance because my perspective has been shifted to a very different outlook. I have been moved beyond scale dependence, because I know what the numbers do and don't mean.

So for me, I am absolutely proud of the numbers in my sidebar, and proud of this chart. I am not ashamed by the spikes after junk food, vacations, or what have you, and not perplexed over why it went down one week and up another. Daily weight tracking has been absolutely crucial to my success as a dieter, because it has given me the perspective I need to do this for the rest of my life.

Is this something that might be suitable for YOU? We don't all fall pregnant along our weight loss journeys, but daily data gives us more information to work with and a more accurate picture of what our bodies are doing than weekly weights. It might be just the ticket you need to help you move past perpetual diet mode and into the mindset of a maintainer. If you would like to start your own chart, this is one of many resources that can help you do it: The Hacker's Diet Log.

How often do you weigh and what made you choose that frequency?

Appointment went well.  My blood pressure is great at 110/75, baby boy was kicking up a storm and moving to the point that Dr. Bell couldn't even tell what position he was in, because he kept changing it :)

I am up 4-6 pounds at 24 weeks, depending on what scale and time of day the weight is taken, which is great news.  Unfortunately I am too wiped out to do much exercising right now and even the slightest walking or lifting has been making me contract. I am not on bedrest, but the doctor does want me to take it easy.  Oh, and I am not crazy after all, my fundal height is measuring in at 29 weeks instead of 24, so the early heartburn issues make a little more sense.

If I start contracting again like I did this weekend I am supposed to head into the OB triage at the hospital to be checked out. This just goes to show how different every pregnancy is, I had NO preterm issues with the girls!

So yup, I think that is the bulk of the news.  My next appointment marks my third trimester, nasty glucose test, and the home stretch of this thing! It does look like my exercise schedule may be on permanent hiatus for the remainder of this, if walking around a grocery store makes me contract! I am still cleaning and running the house at my normal level without issue, so my NEAT is fairly high. My concentration right now is still on tightening up the eating side of things again. I have been craving protein like crazy, and given that my weight jumped AND my uterus measurement jumped, I think that protein was to facilitate a baby growth spurt. I am getting enough protein and fruit, but vegetables have been a sad, sorry affair. Fortunately, it is a fixable problem!

All in all, I am very happy with how this pregnancy is progressing. I will post another belly picture in the next few weeks to show how round a short gal like me gets during pregnancy, as well as a face shot update to boost my self esteem and show off my hard work in making my hair healthier too. I think I need some vanity sessions, to distract myself from the constant struggle of accepting a rising scale no matter WHAT I am eating :)

Take care, everyone! 

Okay everyone, this is just a quick note - I had some ouchie contractions this weekend and have been generally exhausted and somewhat sore from our son laying transverse in my pelvis, so that has hampered a lot of additional activity, but I did weigh in at 216.8 this morning, which may be a bit high considering the sodium in my dinners the past two nights!

I have an OB appointment this afternoon I am getting ready for right now, so if anything eventful happens there I'll update you. I am also 24 weeks today, which is the cusp of viability, should our son be born early. YAY! In other baby related news, my brother's girlfriend is pregnant with her 4th (second with him), I just found out a few minutes ago, and a friend of mine from church is pregnant with her 3rd. Congratulations to all the pregnant mamas!

Word to the wise - before your weekly weigh-in it isn't the best idea to load up on sodium and carbohydrates. No, really it isn't. Because it WILL make you retain water and generally do wicked things to the scale.

Yesterday was a BAD food day. Not out of control, but not super healthy choices either. I gave in and ate what my husband makes the kids for Sunday breakfast - pancakes and eggs (I added the protein in for myself, he didn't make them any). Lunch was a beef soup (healthy but still salty), nectarine, and some lava cake (carbs and deliciousness, though only about 300 calories a serving). Dinner was sushi with lots of soy sauce and some unsweetened iced tea. Not a terrible day, no binges, but over my calorie preferences AND full of things that do not make the scale respond kindly.

But as with all things, I am far from beating myself up over this. As a daily weigher I could predict what this would do to me - I went from averaging in the mid 216's with baby weight bloated up to 218.0 with all of those water-retaining nutrients this morning. I know I didn't gain two pounds this week and tomorrow will likely see me back to my normal slow up-trending pattern, but there was definitely a rueful chuckle as I stepped on the scale this morning!

Though I have been sapped of energy lately, I am absolutely planning on doing a short workout this afternoon. I need to keep my base muscle tone up to help me with this birth, and slacking on moving isn't going to help me in the long run. So I will still be taking it easy, but vacation time is OVER right now, when it comes to my health! I am still going to gain, that's a feature of pregnancy I can't avoid, but I need to maximize my health in the meantime, So, I'm working on it :)

How did all of you do this weekend? On plan or off the rails?

I ended up not going in to have my hand looked at, as it wasn't getting any worse. My body seems to have fought whatever nastiness was associated with the bite and the swelling is pretty much gone. The whole area still itches but it is definitely on the mend, which is great!

The scale has stuck at 216.4 for three days in a row, so I am assuming that, holiday or growing baby, that is my accurate weight. It is up about six pounds from my pre pregnancy estimate and up about three from what the doctor measured me at for ten weeks gestation, so I'm quite happy with that. I am still struggling with lethargy and not doing my exercise block but that's okay, I am really not feeling like pushing at myself right now and need rest instead. I could beat myself up over my lack of exercise, but honestly I am still doing a lot of standing and moving throughout the day, just not a lot of hard, intentional movement. I feel okay today but my husband will be coming home early for a church thing we have, so I will be using my exercise block of time to start early on dinner before we go.

I think it is important to remind myself that NONE of this is failure. I am healthy and fairly active, my body is handling pregnancy fatigue and aches very well, but it's not the time to push myself hard if my energy or joints aren't up to to it. I still want to do more, but my body isn't really up for it right now.

I've had a few splurgy treats for eating, but overall am doing fine on that and staying around my calorie budget. No serious weightloss has occurred, I don't think, but I am not gaining either. This is as good as I Dan ask for in the holding pattern that is the next few months. I don't know if I'll make 189 by January this year or not, since I will only have two months postpartum and that assumes no stitches or surgery to recover from, but I can't say this year was bad in terms of weight if I consider how much I'd have gained if I wasn't watching what I ate. Probably 250 and higher, I'm sure. So maintenance really has been a feat unto itself and I know I should be proud and not frustrated. Like I said, I just need to keep reminding myself of how well I am doing and how far I have come, instead of frustration at a perceived 'lack of progress'.

It's all about progress and not perfect, after all :)

Excuse the lack of updates, it was sheer laziness on my part!

Things are going well enough here, though I have had a rougher time exercising this past week due to general busyness and exhaustion, but am trying to fix that this week (no success yet, and tonight will be no exception, sadly!). Eating has been okay, though still a little short of veggies most of the time. Several get-togethers this weekend upped my sodium and junk food totals a bit, so I was not surprised to weigh in on Sunday at 216.6, and Tuesday at 217. It's the nature of holiday food, it will go away soon enough :)

On Memorial Day I got a mosquito bite on my hand and it has only become worse, with my whole hand now swelling with cellulitis. So this afternoon my husband is coming home early to take me to the doctor and make sure I don't have what I think I have - which is a bacterial infection from the stupid bug. Worst case scenario I end up on antibiotics and my guts are unhappy for a week or two. Its better than having sepsis during pregnancy, thats for sure, and I will be glad for anything to take away the pain and tenderness of the whole top of my hand right now. It's obnoxious!

Let's see, anything else? I definitely can't wear anything but maternity gear now, outside the house at least. All my non-maternity shirt ride up embarrassingly. I also had to dig out a bra that was previously just a bit too big in the cups and make that my standard, because everything else was too tight and not supporting me anymore, especially since the bands became loose with weightloss. So I am in a 38-40J right now, which is massive, but I actually look slimmer and better shaped in a bra of the correct size, as they show off my waist and make everything sit where it is supposed to. They don't look huge under clothes, so I'll take what I can get ;)

Scheduling is still going well, with some flexibility thrown in for tired mornings and late night - I have, unfortunately, been skipping my morning bible study for some extra sleep, but I am hoping to resume it tomorrow. And on the scheduling note, I now I have to go clean bathrooms, so I'll leave it here.

How did all of YOU do with your Memorial Day eating? Was it stressful, fun, on plan, off plan, etc? I just madr sensible choices and enjoyed myself, and I honestly didn't bother tracking more than the basic calories as best I could approximate. I'm okay with that!

Get your vegetables, crazy lady!

Seriously self, I know you're staying within your calories, and protein is the MOST important when growing a human being, but the quality of the calories is at LEAST as important as the quantity of them. You're eating good, but cut out some treats and add back in some roughage, for the sake of your colon, if nothing else!

There is no excuse for being entirely on plan except for missing most fruit/veggie servings. I want to see ONE OF EACH AT *LEAST* every meal, six servings, minimum, per day. You're eating about four. Do better, because you KNOW you feel better when you do.

I'm doing my part, you hold up your end of the bargain.

Sincerely, Your Guts

Another week of not much to say, forgive my boring maintenance mode :)

This morning found me at 215.2, which is what I was bouncing back and forth to all week, when salt bloat subsided in waves. I exercised four of the five days of the week, and just got back from biking the kids to the park again today, with strength training this afternoon. Perhaps the biggest health side effect of maintaining my schedule is having no excuse to not exercise, as incidental exercise is booked in everyday at 11:00 (in the form of taking the kids down to the park on my bike or hanging with them in the yard) and intentional workout time everyday from 4-5:00. I usually spend the latter time either walking weighted miles with Walk Away The Pounds (Leslie Sansone) or strength training with resistance bands, and it feels GREAT. Then, just because I am pregnant and all, I even have an hour nap from 5-6:00 and if I am not tired then it is reading/knitting/DVD/bloggy time. All this, and I still get sections of the house cleaned daily, as well as laundry done, homeschooing, dinner prep and cleanup, and time with my husband. I am up and about SO much more, I cannot say enough about how great it is to be getting so much done. And obviously, I am burning a ton more calories as well.

The exercise (strength training, especially) has been key in keeping my weight down, I think, as well as upping my energy and lowering my hip and pelvic pain. When my muscles are stronger, my joints take less of a beating. Its just that simple.

I am currently reading an AMAZING book, New Rules of Lifting For Women, and cannot wait to begin strength training more vigorously, to build some real muscle and increase my fitness and daily calorie burn, I am active enough right now that I am seriously considering upping that exercise during pregnancy and seeing how my body handles it, but if all else fails I can just keep on walking and doing my resistance exercises and hopefully will be in good, strong shape for birth. I will confess that I have been feeling a real drive to move my fitness away from endurance exercises and into strength, given my personal goals and body composition I think I will get a lot more out of it in terms of fitness bang for my hourly buck, and I want to be a STRONG mama as these pounds drop, not just fat-skinny and weak. Especially given the health problems I do have, minor as they are, I know the key is in not taxing my tendons and joints but bolstering my musculature.

So that's what has been on my mind lately.

On a fairly unrelated side note, today marks 20 wells passed, so I am in my fifth month of pregnancy and approximately halfway through! Somehow, it has started RACING by instead of the creep of earlier this year. Hubby and I have also decided on a name for our son, though we're still testing it out mentally to see if it will stick. I am not sure at this point if I will share it before birth or not, but it is one we both like a lot.

Um... Am I forgetting anything? I have been giving into more fast food cravings than usual, but am just logging the calories and moving on. I am obviously not gaining from them, but I know they are not the best choices in terms of nutritional density. So my ongoing goal is to keep my junk food intake to a minimum and eat out only on my date night with my husband on Saturdays. It's not affecting my healthy eating the rest of the time, nor am I bingeing on it (I am satisfied on a LOT less food when eating out than I used to be!) but it's something I want to keep to a rare treat, as it has been for the past two years. I'm not worried, but that is where I am right now. Fit, energetic for the most part, productive, REproductive, and generally plugging along with my eating, food logging, and weight.

As always, nothing to complain about. Life keeps marching on and weight is only a background concern, for which I am VERY thankful!

So I am 24 today.

Honestly, I feel a lot older. Not in any bad way, I'm not jaded or tired, but I am at a very different place in my life that I thought I would be when I considered my future as a teen. And I am also in a very different place than most of my age-based peers. My circle of support, my social group, consists of a bunch of 30-45 year old married-with-kids, not weekend binge drinkers working on their masters or trying to navigate the job market and make their rent. It's hard to believe where life has taken me, but I wouldn't change a thing. Quite the contrary, it has turned out better than I could have ever planned it, myself. So a lovely family, amazing marriage, and fabulous daily life later, happy birthday to ME!

On weight related ramblings - I was 215.2 today, so my salt retention has tapered off nicely. And I am about 30 pounds lighter than I was at this time last year, YAY!

I had another great day of scheduling, and I've worked out five of my six scheduled days I was able to. I did mostly 1-2 mile walks with upper body weight work at the same time, and it has definitely been intense.  Not only that, but my NEAT (non-exercise activity thermogenesis, google it kids!) is worlds higher than what it was, due to reducing my sitting time from several hours throughout the day to, literally, an hour of time while still awake.  I'm up and about constantly and it feels GOOD to be so on top of everything.  My calorie burn is much higher, though i cannot quantitate it with my daily weighing due to pregnancy adding pounds, I can FEEL the difference in my metabolism and my energy. I am more tired at the end of the day, and consequently sleep better too, but while I am awake I have an amazing amount of energy compared to how felt even a few months before the pregnancy, when I was about the same weight but much more sedentary and lazy. Activity breeds energy, as counterintuitive as it sounds, it's absolutely true!

So it's been a good year. A wonderful year. Filled with lots of challenges and lots of changes, and a fair share of heartbreak too. But that's the way life goes, and mine has been wonderfully blessed. I am invigorated for another year of life, healthier and stronger than ever before. I have so much to look forward to, and at this point my biggest struggle is just to take it all in with the amount of appreciation, humility, and thankfulness that so many blessings deserve.

Thank you Lord, for these days you have given me!